Saturday, February 6, 2010

I'm not alone!!!!

One of the overwhelming feelings I've been having is that of feeling "alone" in this. Which is different than saying I'm lonely. I'm not lonely because I have so many friends and family that I'm blessed by, but still none of them are going through what I'm going through. It turns out that there is someone who is going through nearly exactly what I'm going through... and she found me. Since her and her husband are still very much processing and figuring out how to share the news, I am just going to call her, "Kindred Spirit", or Kindred, for now. Kindred is due 5 days earlier than me, is expecting a boy, and recently found out he has Down syndrome. (Oh! AND she has her next doctor's appointment on the same day as I do! Totally useless information, but cool none the less!)She even lives within 40 minutes driving distance from me. We've exchanged a couple of emails and everytime I reply I feel like I'm gushing on and on and have to make a conscious effort to stop myself. It's not uncommon to meet or know people who are expecting around the same time you are, having a baby of the same sex and have coordinating doctor's office visits, because there are SO many people having babies. My good friend Carrie is due just a week before me, is having a boy and has doctor's appointments about a week before me every time. There is so much I get to talk to Carrie about: the sins of maternity clothes, our changing bodies, hormones, feelings of excitement/fear/anticipation about having our second babies, and more. It is actually really fun to share the experience with someone you like so much. But, I am now feeling doubly blessed by this new "friend" who can relate on so many levels to the emotional rollercoaster that comes with getting a prenatal diagnosis of Ds. There are very few of us that decide to carry to term and know about Ds before birth. In my last post, I thought the numbers were something like 80-90% of women who get a prenatal diagnosis of Ds, terminate their pregnancies. I was wrong. It is 92%!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So, Kindred and I are in the 8% who chose to have their babies. 8% is mind boggling. 8% isn't common. And 8% certainly explains feeling alone. So, it's especially nice to know that I'm not alone!

I finished another great read. This one is called "Road Map to Holland". The author, Jennifer Graf Groneberg, writes a very emotional and heartfelt description about her son's first two years with Down syndrome. It is uplifting and terrifying all at the same time. Jennifer didn't have a prenatal diagnosis and had to do all of her coping and processing after her sons were born (twins- one with Ds, one without). Plus, her babies were 7 weeks early (UGH!!), so the fears and concerns while dealing with the NICU seem pretty overwhelming. Since my last visit to Dr. Ballet, I am still concerned about this tracheoesophogeal fistula possibility- especially since it can lead to pre term labor. I have another appointment on Monday and I'm wishin', hopin' and praying that there will be no defects at all!!

Since I'm wishin' and hopin' again, I'll leave you with a little clip from what now seems like a lifetime ago...

1 comment:

evrfwd said...

glad to hear you found a kindred spirit! that is so awesome! and glad everything went well today too. oxox

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